Lohan Cashes In!
Dina Lohan has decided that since society clearly isn’t interested in daughter Ali Lohan, that she would keep her money-makers in Lindsay’s direction and is now trying to sell a tell-all book. The leaked Prologue reads, “I blamed her friends, her career and her handlers for an (sic) newfound lifestyle of partying excessively.” Yeah, and how about yourself? I didn’t...
Soulja Boy Up In That Big House!
Rapper Soulja Boy got the handcuffs cranked up on him after being busted and jailed today for possession of drugs, weapons, money, and a puppy. The puppy being the most shocking, by far. The po-po pulled his car over for a “routine traffic stop” (AKA racial profiling) where it was discovered that Mr. Boy had enough marijuana to get him an “intent to distribute” charge...
Who ever said looks don’t matter, was seriously… ugly.– Zack Gonzalez
You Go, Chaz-Bo!
So someone found the joke I made about Chaz Bono in my last blog post “horribly offensive.” I just want to clear the air. I am not against The Chaz in any way. If he wants to go out there and shake his man-boobies, than by all means, you go girl! Sorry, I mean, boy! I’ll even wear an “I’d Bone Bono” shirt to show my support. He’s still got a vagina,...
Dancing with the "Stars"
This week was the premier of the thirteenth season of Dancing with the Stars. This season, producers said they would only accept A-list celebrities. Well, they hit it out of the park with this line-up. Nancy Grace, who’s only entertaining on the news; the most unentertaining part of TV. David Arquette, the actor who’s most famous for his role in rehab. Rob Kardashian, who’s...
I’m a virgin, but if we sleep together, it’ll be my 26th time losing...– Zack Gonzalez
The Game is Black!
Breaking news America, rapper Jayceon Terrell Taylor, better known as The Game, is black! This may come as a shock to some of you. He’s claiming that because of his racial ethnicity, he was axed to leave Houston’s (a restaurant owned by The Hillstone Group) in Santa Monica. The “racist-urant” (as he calls it) requested that he leave for violating their dress code and...
Oksana Scores... Nothing!
Oksana Grigorieva was offered 15 million dollars to drop her lawsuit against Mel Gibson. She said no, her plastic surgery would cost much more than that and took him to court, where she landed a total of $750,000 over a six-year time span. SLAM-DUNK! You go, girl! You showed him who’s boss… him. If there is anyone more moronic than Oksana Grigorieva then they would’ve married...
Wat” does not mean “What;” It’s a Buddhist temple in...– Zack Gonzalez
If I listened to Nike and followed their “Just Do It” tagline,...– Zack Gonzalez
Bono You Didn't!
Chaz Bono has signed on for the new season of DWTS and will be paired with a female partner. That is completely unfair to last season’s Wendy Williams. She had to stick it out with a man. I know Chaz (that is such a horrible name) is “legally” a man, but he’s one part too short to measure up. And if there’s anyone who knows how hard it is, it’s Wendy.
When life hands you lemons… Throw them at people.– Zack Gonzalez
Aber. & Fitch vs. The Sitch
Abercrombie and Fitch has offered Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino a “substantial” amount of money to no longer strut his abs in their clothes. Apparently only their hand-selected whores are allowed to rock the overly-fitted apparel. They claim it’s “distressing” to many of their “fans.” The offer was also extended to all Jersey Shore cast...
Vh1's Next Big Hit
So, in recent baby news, former American Idol winner Fantasia Barrino has announced that she is expecting her second child. She has not, however, announced who the father is. Which leaves me to assume that she’s still looking. It would break my heart to see VH1 miss the opportunity to create yet another trashy reality series out of this. I can imagine I Fucked Fantasia being the title of...
Oksana Grigorieva wants more money from Mel Gibson for “traumatizing” her son, Sasha. I wonder if her obviously manufactured tapes will make credible evidence. If there is anything more fake than Joan Rivers’s face, it’s clearly those tapes. According to TMZ, Mel scared her fourteen-year-old son so much that he “hid under his bed.” If a fourteen-year-old is...
What a Whore-able Father
Gary Shirley is a disgrace to mankind. I cannot believe that I even for a single second felt remotely sorry for the poor guy when he’d get beat by his baby mama, Amber. TheTeen Mom ”star” (if you want to call him that) is nothing more than a poor excuse for a man. Spending $5,000 on eleven-hours of cheap whores? What do you even do for ELVEN-HOURS? That’s one very long...
All you see on TV now is teenagers shooting out babies like it’s a...